Never
Been Kissed Movie Review:
Drew
Barrymore. It must be great to be as adorable as her. Every
single film I've ever seen her in shows her as being one
very likable gal. Even the thriller Poison Ivy couldn't
make her out to be a really evil person. I somehow can't
see this adorability to be a family trait; did you think
Lionel Barrymorre was adorable as Mr. Potter in It's A Wonderful
Life! I didn't think so. So, her sweetness must be a genuinely
Drew-ish phenomenon. And it never falters in her new hit
Never Been Kissed.
Drew
plays Josie, a copy editor for the Chicago Sun-Times, who
desperately wants a ``real`` assignment, one which doesn't
involve being subordinate to occasionally annoying employees.
She believes in her talent as a writer, and during a lunch
with her friends at work, she proves to them the poetry
burrowed in her soul when she describes what she feels it'd
be like to be in love. Then one day, on a whim of the strange
managing editor played by Garry Marshall, Josie gets her
chance. She is to go undercover as a high-school student
to report on what kids are like these days. She is so happy
at this chance at stardom. But when she tells her brother,
she is painfully reminded of what high school was like for
her. She was considered one of the geeks, and was nicknamed
``Josie Grossie``. In truth, her brother had created that
name --- but how was he to know it would catch on so fast!!!!
Yet she is willing to take the plunge and return to high
school.
Despite
this courage, Josie is unable to reconcile herself with
the truth of her past, especially the painful trick played
on her for the senior prom. She had been asked out by a
popular boy, only to have egg on her face (literally) when
the limo passes by, with him and all of his friends laughing
with utter heartlessness. This is of course where the title
comes in. Josie has never been kissed, not at her prom,
nor anywhere else. But experienced film-goers will probably
not be too bold as to believe that this situation will be
reversed by somebody in the cast by the end of the picture.
There are two potential contenders; a graduating student
named Guy, whose first meeting with Josie results in awkwardness
and embarrassment, and also her English teacher, who doesn`t
suspect that the high-school girl he admires for her writing
talents is actually old enough to be something more than
an aspiring student.
Her
plans do not work out as hoped. She is unable to pass herself
off as a cool kid, especially since her first real friends
are the math wizards of the school, and she even joins their
math club, The Denominators. Of course, as in all films
and TV shows aimed at teenagers, any sign one has a fully
functioning brain is a liability if a character wants to
be cool. So of course, her editor demands that she try to
fit in, and she does, in a funny scene where she enters
a party, and ingests something she didn`t quite expect to
give her the uninhibited feeling she eventually has.
But
it`s the help of her brother which makes everything go her
way. He returns to high school as well, as he hadn`t graduated,
and hopes to finish school for a baseball scholarship, which
was his dream. He, naturally, becomes popular within hours,
and tells everyone that he dated this new girl and are still
friends. This `connection` with such a cool guy naturally
makes Josie an ``in`` girl. But she is on the outs with
her math club friend. And even with her first-hand knowledge
of the in-crowd, she hasn`t yet written anything worth publishing,
and both her and her editor`s jobs are the first to go if
she has nothing to show for her experience in the next two
weeks. But the paper suddenly hits on an idea. They realize
the English teacher admires Josie greatly. So how about
she attempts a little bit of seduction and then create a
scandal out of it! The teacher would be exposed for the
pig he is, and the newspaper would have an exclusive story.
However, Josie is very unwilling to do such a thing to a
person who she genuinely admires as well.
As
I said before, Drew is a real charmer. She is able to make
you sympathize with her insecurities, especially in the
flashback scenes from her own high school trauma. She is
daring in her willingness to behave and appear less than
flattering, with her tanglely hair, terrible acne, bad clothes,
and excessive self-conciousness, in order to convince you
of the distance between her geekiness and the seemingly
more confident and beautiful people of the hip crowd. (This
is more than I can say for Josie`s math club friend, who
nobody seems to notice is actually about as pretty as all
the cool girls.) Her complete alienation makes you feel
much more strongly and painfully in those moments when she
is taunted and abused by her peers, and especially at her
joy at being invited to the prom. You just know that something
terrible will happen. Also, in the scenes from the present,
Drew`s character still displays residue of those earlier
traits beneath her new professionalism. She is a klutz,
and is given to stammering in tense situations. She`s a
goof, but you gotta love her!
This
is a cute movie, but I think it paints a rosy picture of
high school life. It assumes that the teenagers surrounding
her (and the teenagers viewing the movie) will take her
final speech to heart, that we mustn`t run people down and
believe popularity is the only thing which matters. I feel
the real teenager would probably look at her and snicker,
because they don`t see themselves as having a problem. They
think their constant abusing and ostracizing is right and
well deserved. They've already been lost; there is no chance
of saving them. And as I write this, North America is dealing
with the tragic reality of both the Renna Virk murder trial
in Vancouver, and the investigation into yesterday's (April
19) shooting rampage at a Colorado high school. The seeming
ease in which certain individuals go from vicious taunting
to vicious murder casts a dark shadow even over some of
the antics in this movie, especially the moments involving
the math club friend. The perpetuators of those actions
are probably just as heartless and indifferent as the kids
who were part of the group who beat Virk to a senseless
pulp that night. You could somehow imagine one of them sitting
back, filing their nails, as their friends kicked someone
around, which is what one of the witnesses who took the
stand the other day had told. I`m not optimistic enough
to believe that they would suddenly develop a sense of fairness
because someone told them what that was. They are too absorbed
in their deluded sense of hipness to care. So why should
they give a damn if someone tells them people actually get
hurt when they are abused! If I were to write Josie`s lines,
she wouldn`t tell these teenagers to change. She`d realize
they weren`t worth the bother and write a scathing report
on the egoism of our kids today.
David
Macdonald
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