Rollerball
Movie Review:
When
the film starts, Marcus (L.L. Cool J) is already involved
in rollerball, an extreme sport that crosses basketball,
motocross, jai-alai, roller derby
and the XFL. The games take place in Kazakhstan and are
beamed all over the world, though the league is currently
without a deal to televise the sport in the United States.
He talks Jonathan (Chris Klein) into joining him, promising
unbelievable money in a relatively short period of time
- plenty
more than Marcus can make as an accountant, which is what
he studied in school. There's a brief reference made to
the two men being classmates,
which considering the apparent age difference, makes one
of them either really smart or really dumb.
Flash to four months later, where Jonathan has become the
darling of the league and owner Alexi Petrovich's (Jean
Reno) key to securing a North
American cable deal. The only trouble is Alexi will do anything
to increase
the sport's television ratings, including staging dangerous
incidents of
violence that grow more and more intense.
Rollerball was reportedly to be an R-rated summer blockbuster
last year, but a bunch of violence and, reportedly, a full
frontal scene with Rebecca
Romijn-Stamos (Aurora) were cut out to get the PG-13 rating.
In case you don't get the message that the sport is all
about the money, the point is driven home again and again
and again with dozens of shots of cash
being counted and the "instant ratings" board
skyrocketing whenever viewers see blood.
Owner
Petrovich makes sure his stars have the fastest, coolest
cars and live the highest of high lives. But come game time,
he keeps an eye on the instant TV ratings, ordering strategic
"accidents" to spice up the matches when the audience
dwindles.
"It
was only a matter of time before one of those creeps figured
out their take would go up with a little blood on the tracks,"
Marcus observes.
Jonathon,
Marcus and Aurora are bland at best through out, and Jonathon
dips to caricature near the end in a showdown so silly it
resembles a Saturday Night Live spoof of action films. Petrovich
is so bad he becomes unintentionally hilarious.
The
rollerball outfits and arenas are too absurd to describe.
Except for Jonathon and Marcus, everyone else is wearing
extravagant helmets and pink tutus and dresses and knights
in armor, a jester's outfit, skull masks and pointy-eared
helmets.
The
same absurdness can be seen in the repetitive, head-banging
music the rollerball "house bands" play to enliven
the crowds. In the final game,
Petrovich suspends all rules, fouls, and penalties. This
makes no difference that I could see.
The
movie ultimately glorifies violence as the athletes viciously
rebel against the owners and their henchmen. Adult audiences
will find the rabid
climax laughable, but for teens, toward whom the movie is
targeted, the message is horrible: Feeling oppressed? Pick
up a stool and crack a few
skulls. It's your right.
If you
only see one blood-sport movie about an extreme sport that
crosses basketball, motocross, jai-alai, roller derby and
the XFL all year, make sure it is not Rollerball (2002).
Rollerbomb would be more apropos, in my opinion. This movie
gives reviewers an understanding of why negative numbers
were created.
The
first "Rollerball," which was made in 1975 and
starred James Caan, contained strong elements of social
commentary. It took place 40 years in the
future, when the world was controlled by corporations that
wiped out war, poverty, unrest -- and any vestige of individuality.
Rollerball, a sport that combined roller derby, motorcycling
and basketball, was the outlet for our violent tendencies
and the opiate of the masses. The message of the 1975 film,
which revealed the depravity of excessive violence is pretty
much jettisoned here. This version is all about the violence
- the more, the better.
The
1975 sci-fi social thriller "Rollerball" had a
mood of government and corporate oppression that this movie
does not come close to touching. Where
the original movie raised, what were then, shocking questions
about a corporate capacity to murder for profit, the question
is now taken for granted as gambling syndicates control
a game for the masses in third world locations.
In this
remake, the various costumes of the rollerball players come
straight out of some sort of WWF or WCW game, but in a team
sport it looks ludicrous. All the masks would limit line
of sight for the players and make it extremely easy to defeat
them.
The
only reason this movie isn't rated lower is the opening
of Rollerball, which depicts two street lugers racing each
other to the bay while avoiding both traffic and pursuing
police cruisers.
1 out of
5
The Critical Couch Potato
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